Red Mass Group has learned that Massachusetts Governor Charles Duane Baker IV plans to fight former heavyweight champion Riddick Bowe in a boxing match.
The fight will take place at the DCU center in Worcester, MA. Unfortunately, access from 290 is restricted due to excessive snow. All roads to the Baker fight lead through Shrewsbury.
A concerned Governor Baker expressed disapointment that the MassGOP platform required him to take on a second career as a pugilist. “At the end of the day, I’m trying to be a good team player.” said Baker.
When asked his opinion of Baker, Riddick Bowe said “I think he’s a good man. I like him. I got nothing against him, but I’m definitely gonna make orphans of his children.” When the existence of the children’s mother was raised, the former champ indicated that he imagined she would die from grief.
Local political insiders expect to profit greatly from the fight. Former Governor Deval Patrick will be paid $7,500 per day to serve as “Deputy Ambassador to Inflated Titles and Phony Commissions.”
Proceeds from the fight will benefit the Marlborough Republican City Committee.
Apologies to the Simpsons.